When you think of your precious life what comes to mind? Every single person on this planet, regardless of who they are or what they’ve done, has a precious life. And that includes you! I don’t know if you can relate, but it’s easy for me to focus on life’s imperfections. It’s as if I fixate on the “blemishes” rather than simply viewing what is right in front of me, my life. Often times when I think of my life, insecurities, failures, and disappointments creep in, stealing what matters most – my life existence. Why am I so concerned with seeing the negative?
As I’ve brought awareness to this through intentional mindfulness, I’ve learned that the time to celebrate and value life is now. When I was younger, however I thought I would value my life once I achieved all the things I desired. I’d say things like, “once I get this or obtain this I’ll be happy.” I was feeding myself an illusion and missing out on life itself. This was the wrong way of viewing my journey. The joy of life is found in the process. Joy, after all in never a destination. It is a choice we make in our minds to mindfully appreciate what is. Joy is found in the journey. The time to celebrate is now! Not tomorrow. Not once you achieve the goal you are working towards.
One day, as I was getting my kids packed and ready to leave the house, I thought about this concept. On this particulate day, I had a fun filled adventure planned for us. On the day prior, my excitement built as I anticipated a great afternoon with my two favorite children. On the day of our adventure, however I found myself struggling to maintain my same level of excitement and appreciation as it felt like I was constantly bombarded with set-backs. “Ruby! Where did you put your shoes?” “Kenton, you need to clean up your room before we go. Stop playing your switch!” “Ruby, we can’t leave the house until you go the bathroom. I don’t want you having an accident on our drive.” “Kenton, I told you a million times to get dressed already! I am not going to repeat myself again!” Set-back after set-back popped up as I worked to prepare not only my children, but myself and our house for our planned departure. Sometimes I describe being a parent in the following way. As a parent to young children it can feel like you are constantly running against the wind. A strong force (your kids) is pushing against you every step of the way. Opposition is constantly pursuing as you struggle to simply put one foot in front of the other. And that’s when it hit me. “Joy, the adventure you planned for today is already happening. You don’t have to stress about making one great moment. The great moment is happening now. It’s found in the build up and preparation. It’s found in the moments that don’t seem meaningful. The truth is, all of it plays a roll in the goal for the day. Nothing is wasted.” As soon as I processed this, I found myself beginning to relax. Rather than feeling anxious about getting to our destination and “having fun,” I realized our destination was right now. We were living our adventure right now. The difference remained in my perspective, in my ability to choose an attitude of joy, patience, and gratitude.
This summer my children and I will have the opportunity to see the joy in the journey. We, like you, have the choice in how we will see and value our world. We have goals and plans for this summer. As we anticipate fun summer days, we’ll work on focusing on what matters most – celebrating our precious lives now!
Through the struggle we find victory because each challenge successfully completed plays a part in our quest for victory. No battle was ever won in just one fight. The preparation, the choice to keep going despite the set-backs (wind and kids), is what makes the taste of success so much richer and desirable. As you plan for your summer adventures remind yourself to appreciate the steps you take to make the desired moment a reality. The positive, the negative, the fun, the difficult will happen, but you choose how they will color your perspective.
I recently started reading, Don’t Believe Everything You Think by Joseph Nguyen. I’ve known of this book for sometime, but never made the decision to pick it up. Now that I’ve picked it up I am glad I did. In it, Joseph reminds us of our inner strength and encourages us to look within for insight and perspective. The quote below, I think ties in well with my writing above and one I’d like to share with you. “What we hold on to perpetuates our reality. What we let go of creates new possibilities.” Joseph Nguyen. In my example with my children, if I continued to hold onto the perspective of negativity as we prepared to leave the house our adventure together would have been clouded with disappointment. Our reality would be just that, a disappointing experience from my perspective. Did you catch how I said from my perspective? For all I know my kids, regardless of my own feelings, could have and most likely would have had a great time. If I could let go of my unrealistic expectations I would allow possibility, creativity, and enjoyment to fill our adventure together. Letting go can sound scary. Believe me, as a self-diagnosed control freak, this idea gives me anxiety, but when I free myself from the chains of my own mind I realize my inner strength and grow more in love with myself. When I grow more in love with myself my perspective changes from a critical mind searching for “blemishes” to a grateful mind seeing my life for what it is – precious!
“Thought is not reality, yet it is through thought that our realities are created.” Sydney Banks
“Reality is what is happening right now. It is the objective circumstance that is occurring without any meaning or judgement attached to it. And so what we experience is not reality itself but our perception of reality. Any meaning or thinking we give something is self-created and our choice. Our feelings come not from external events but from our own thinking about the events.” Joseph Nguyen
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