Don’t forget the things that made you who you are on your way to where you are now. Today, I found myself reflecting on how I got to this place in my life.
I’m really proud of where I am right now. Proud of the work I’ve put in, the growth I’ve experienced, and the person I’m becoming. But something I don’t want to lose along the way is the connection to the things that helped me get here.
For me, some of those things are time spent on the water, paddleboarding, writing, reflecting, and simply allowing myself the space to think, breathe, and be. Those quiet moments have played such an important role in shaping who I am today. And I don’t want to forget that.
So today, I worked hard. I put my best foot forward, stayed focused, and made the most of my time so I could carve out a little space to get back on the water. Not because I had nothing else to do, but because I know how important that time is to me. And as I spent that time on the water, I found myself thinking about something bigger.
How do we continue moving forward without losing sight of the things that helped us get here?
Because when I think about the person I am today, I recognize that it’s not just the accomplishments, opportunities, or experiences that have shaped me. It’s the lessons I’ve learned along the way. The work ethic my parents instilled in me. The importance of showing up and giving my best. The value of helping others, taking initiative, and recognizing that even the smallest actions matter. But it’s also the quieter lessons. Learning to listen to myself. Recognizing when I need time to reflect. Understanding that being intentional with my time doesn’t always mean doing more. Sometimes, it means making space for the things that help me feel most like myself. And perhaps that’s what I’ve been thinking about most lately.
How do I continue becoming the person I want to be while staying connected to the person who helped me get here?
I think the answer begins with how I choose to spend my time, where I invest my energy, and how I show up each day.
Which brings me to a reflection I wrote recently, inspired by something I read in Ryan Holiday’s The Obstacle Is the Way. It’s a reflection on the lessons that shaped me, the values I continue to carry, and the importance of remembering that how we show up in the smallest moments often says the most about who we are.
How You Do Anything Is How You Do Everything.
Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about how I use my time, where I invest it, and where I’m putting my energy. Am I investing my time and energy in places that are serving me well? Am I focusing on what truly matters? Is this the best path forward for me?
These are questions I’ve been asking myself more often lately. Not because I necessarily need to change everything I’m doing, but because I want to be intentional about how I’m living, working, and showing up each day. This morning, I read a chapter from The Obstacle Is the Way by Ryan Holiday that really resonated with me. He talks about how we approach our work, what motivates us, and how we choose to face the obstacles that come our way. One of the biggest reminders I took away from his writing is that it’s not always about where we’re going, but how we show up along the way. Sometimes, on the road to where we want to go, we have to do things we’d rather not do. We take on responsibilities that aren’t exciting. We complete tasks that nobody notices. We do work that may seem insignificant compared to the bigger goals we’re working toward. But does that make the work any less important? Absolutely not. Every task is an opportunity to show up, give our best, and demonstrate what we value. It doesn’t matter whether anyone notices, whether we receive recognition, or whether the outcome is exactly what we hoped it would be. What matters is how we approach the work in front of us.
Work hard. Be honest. Help others.
Three simple principles that can guide us through just about anything. And one idea from my reading especially stayed with me:
How you do anything is how you do everything.
As I sat with those words, I couldn’t help but reflect on my childhood and the lessons I learned growing up.
The Lessons That Started at Home.
One thing I am incredibly grateful for is the work ethic that both my mother and father instilled in me. I started working at my dad’s dental office when I was just 14 years old. And when I say working, I mean doing whatever needed to be done. I cleaned patient rooms, set-up and tore down equipment, cleaned restrooms, filed patient information, answered phone calls, greeted patients, and assisted my dad wherever I was needed. There wasn’t a specific task that defined my job. My responsibility was to recognize what needed to be done and do it. Nothing was below me, and everything was an opportunity.
Both my mom and dad taught me something that has stayed with me throughout my life: There is always something to be done. You don’t just sit around waiting for someone to tell you what to do.
“There is always something to be done, Joy. So, do that.”
It was such a simple lesson, but one that shaped the way I approached work, responsibility, and eventually, life. They taught me that how I invest my time matters. It’s a reflection of what I value, the person I am, and the person I want to become. If I value myself and the work I’m doing, I’m going to give it my best. No task is too small. No responsibility is beneath me. Every opportunity is a chance to learn, grow, and contribute. And those lessons didn’t stop at the dental office.
We Don’t Keep Score. We’re a Family.
My mother is one of nine children, and I am one of ten. Growing up in a big family taught me something equally important about responsibility, humility, and helping others. It didn’t matter who put the milk away last time. It didn’t matter who cleaned up the mess or whose turn it was to help.
We don’t keep score. We’re a family.
If something needs to be done, you simply do it. Not because you’re going to receive recognition. Not because someone owes you something in return. And certainly not because you’re keeping track of who did what. You do it because you’re part of something bigger than yourself. Because the more you give, the more you help others, and the more you contribute, the more you grow yourself. It’s a win-win. And ego? Ego doesn’t need to be part of the equation. What matters is recognizing what needs to be done and being willing to do it.
See a need. Fill a need.
It’s such a simple philosophy, but one that has shaped so much of who I am today. Looking back, I realize my parents weren’t just teaching me how to work hard or how to contribute to our family. They were teaching me how to show up in life. To take initiative. To be dependable. To recognize opportunities to help. To understand that even the smallest actions have value. And perhaps most importantly, they were teaching me that my time and energy are worth investing in things that matter.
How We Show Up Matters.
As I reflect on Ryan Holiday’s writing, I realize just how deeply those childhood lessons connect to the way I approach my life today. How I spend my time matters. How I show up matters. How I treat others matters. And how I approach even the smallest responsibilities matters. It’s easy to get caught up in what’s next. The next opportunity. The next goal. The next accomplishment. The next chapter. But what about right now? What about the responsibilities sitting in front of us today? What about the people who need our help, the work that needs our attention, and the opportunities we have to make a difference in the ordinary moments? Those moments matter, too. In fact, I would argue that those moments are where so much of our character is built. Because it’s easy to give our best when we’re excited about something, when the work feels meaningful, or when we know someone is watching. But what about when nobody is watching? What about when the task is difficult, repetitive, or something we’d rather not do? That’s when we have an opportunity to put our values into action.
To choose hard work.
To choose honesty.
To choose helping others.
And to take pride in knowing we gave our best, regardless of the outcome.
Carrying Those Lessons Forward.
I’m incredibly grateful to my parents for giving me the opportunity to learn these lessons, not just through their words, but through their actions. They taught me the value of hard work, honesty, humility, and helping others. And as I continue growing, learning, and navigating new opportunities and challenges, I want to carry those lessons forward. Not because I have something to prove to anyone, but because I know the value of giving my best. Which brings me back to the questions I’ve been asking myself lately.
Where am I investing my time? Where am I putting my energy? Am I focusing on what truly matters? And am I showing up in a way that reflects the person I want to be?
Maybe the answer isn’t always about doing more, accomplishing more, or finding the next big opportunity. Maybe it’s about being more intentional with what is already in front of me. Recognizing where I can make a difference. Giving my best to the responsibilities I’ve been given. Helping others whenever I can. And remembering that how I choose to spend my time is a reflection of what I value. Because at the end of the day, it’s not just about where we’re going. It’s about who we’re becoming along the way.
And if there’s one lesson I want to continue carrying with me, it’s this: How you do anything is how you do everything.
Final thought:
Don’t become so focused on where you’re going that you forget the things that helped you get there. And don’t become so busy building a life that you forget to make time to live it.
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